What ruined your day?

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LSD Jellyfish
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Re: What ruined your day?

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MaxRebo320 wrote: Sun Mar 26, 2023 4:52 pm I guess more "what ruined my year/past few months", but times have been quite tough on my family since last Summer or so.

I guess things technically started in late-April, when my grandmother suffered a massive heart attack. She managed to recover, but the whole thing took a serious toll on her already-declining health.

Fast-forward to mid-July (where my mom also lost her job, though she fortunately found another soon enough), and my uncle (her son) basically commits suicide via sustaining a urinary tract infection and refusing to seek help for it. He wasn't a bad person, but someone who messed up at life in just about every way imaginable (hence why he was living with her). Still, the whole situation was a complete clusterfuck, resulting in grandma's mental health going down a serious downwards spiral. We moved her into an assisted living facility, where she's managed to recover remarkably (both mentally and physically). My sister and her boyfriend took the house that was theirs.

Around September, I find a girl I thought shared feelings for me (after us getting together numerous times over the school semester and summer) has been going out with another dude for a couple of weeks. I guess I use that as a "wakeup call" to tell her how I feel, and she more or less friendzones me, while insisting there's nothing going on with the other guy. We promise to still be friends, albeit we sort of stop talking. I'll fully admit that I should have tried harder to remain friends with her, but that results in a heated, moronic text message exchange on Thanksgiving that has her completely breaking all contact. And come December, I find she's made it official with that idiot she claimed was "just a friend". On the plus side, they've apparently already broken up.

So 2022 was a pretty shitty year, and I was certainly hoping 2023 would be better. Well, on January 1, my dad decides to go to a minute clinic after feeling crappy for a few days (he had to sit out New Years', which sucked), and it turns out, he has Stage 4 Colon Cancer. Being that late into it, there wasn't a whole lot he could do. With much contemplating, he mostly decided to just let it take its toll, not wanting to burden us like my uncle (his brother) did with his nonsense.

About a month ago, my dad passed away. I'm certainly glad his death was fast and painless. We're still in a state of half-disbelief over the whole thing given how fast it happened. But at the same time, given all of the crap that occurred last year, it's almost like we were prepared for this.

We're pretty worried about grandma, given she lost her only two sons barely 6-months apart from each other. But I mean, if she passes this year, it's not like we won't know how to handle it.

I'm not much of a believer in fate...but I feel all of this misfortune that's struck us HAS to mean something. And surely with all we've been through, there's gotta be a silver lining to it all somewhere (we did get a pretty nice life insurance check out of this whole thing with my dad...).

Jiro Dan's passing likely hit extra hard coming after all of this crap, too. A true childhood (or teenhood, anyways) hero now gone.
Ooof, this is a lot to take in. I'm sorry about your father and your uncle. I hope in regards with your father you got to spend some time with him before his passing. I hope your grandma at the very least can spend time with her grandchildren. At least in your father's case, it seems like bad fate, and not like suicide. She can find solace in the fact that your father, her son, produced you and your sister, and I hope that your relationship with your parents has been nice enough.

I think in regards to the woman, it's best to just let it go. Hard to, mind you, but there will be other people. I've been in that exact same frustrating situation before, and what I've realized is that when people start playing emotional games with you, then it's time to bounce. Friendzone, and the concept of it, can lead to very toxic mindsets, but I agree it's wrong for people to emotionally lead people down paths of thinking they are romantically avaiable or there is still a possibility for intimacy. Although I'm married now, I think as I've gotten older I sort of feel like the idea of longish build-ups to romances are outdated. You either know if you're going to hook up or be with someone after 3 dates/hang out sessions or not. All of the long-term romantic situations (more than 3 months), were quickly sparked. The idea of "wooing someone" or getting to know someone long term, before entering a relationship is a bit of an outdated notion in this current time we live in. People might say, "well you should know more about them before getting together with them", but really during the relationship that's how you truly learn about someone.

Moving to the top of death, strangely, or unstrangely, it feels like a lot of people are dying recently. There's countless names of people I respect here, and famous actors/people I like that are gone. My grandfather has cancer and dementia. He's in a weird state where he can't really think, but also hanging in there despite death seeming to come far sooner. He lives in Florida, and my mother, who was estranged from him, has spent a lot of time going down there to see him. I can't go. It's not financially feasible for me to leave for a couple of days (tickets from Japan to America are in the thousands) and also leave my wife to take care of our 1 year old daughter alone for a while. I feel immense guilt, and I try to rationalize not going, but everyone I talk to says seeing him with dementia is just sad and difficult. My mother repeats to me it's okay not to come, but it still feels all just like excuses. I just don't know what to do.

We're the same age MaxRebo, so I think it's possible we are entering the depressing state of life, where people start to die all the time. I don't mean to rolll everyone's personal experiences into one, but there's been many users on here that have shared experiences of losing a grandparent or loved one very recently. It's a process that we are all entering, an uncomfortable stage of life. People we look up to, mentors, grandparents or mentors are all reaching the age where death becomes more and more likely. I don't intend to be so dark or depressing, but it's important to spend time with relatives and recognize that our time together is very finite. It's happened to you already, but my own father's mortality is something I think about regularly. I feel like I need to save up and go back to NYC for a few weeks between jobs. It feels like since Covid-19 began, the world has become increasingly dark, on both macro and micro levels. I wonder how much of this is just us getting older, and moving out of young adulthood into defintivie adulthood, combined with rampant instability in the world. It's all very strange.

In any case, I wish you luck and hope you can find joy in things.
Spirit Ghidorah 2010 wrote: Sun Dec 03, 2023 4:54 pm Anno-san pleasures me more than Yamasaki-san.

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Re: What ruined your day?

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Dropped a simple comment on a Toku Professor video concerning Jirass...and twelve days later, a bunch of people took to said comment and are currently arguing over "Godzilla is galaxy level, Ultraman is planet level, Godzilla can regenerate from a single molecule left over, etc." and so on and so forth.

Fucking hate it when I unintentionally start petty shit like that.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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ShinGojira14 wrote: Mon Mar 27, 2023 7:29 pm Dropped a simple comment on a Toku Professor video concerning Jirass...and twelve days later, a bunch of people took to said comment and are currently arguing over "Godzilla is galaxy level, Ultraman is planet level, Godzilla can regenerate from a single molecule left over, etc." and so on and so forth.

Fucking hate it when I unintentionally start petty shit like that.
Yep, I feel you there, stupid debates with children like those who can't simply just accept that they are wrong.

Another thing relating to stupid shit, this one small youtuber said that fw godzilla solos fiction, yes, even Xeno from DB, they said he beats heisei "Beyong the concept of neg diff", it's stupid.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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CamtheGodzillafan wrote: Mon Mar 27, 2023 7:50 pm
ShinGojira14 wrote: Mon Mar 27, 2023 7:29 pm Dropped a simple comment on a Toku Professor video concerning Jirass...and twelve days later, a bunch of people took to said comment and are currently arguing over "Godzilla is galaxy level, Ultraman is planet level, Godzilla can regenerate from a single molecule left over, etc." and so on and so forth.

Fucking hate it when I unintentionally start petty shit like that.
Yep, I feel you there, stupid debates with children like those who can't simply just accept that they are wrong.
It's not about being right or wrong; it's just about how quickly one or two people can twist a simple "this concept would be super cool" into a verbal MMA match.

Also, FW Godzilla teeeeeeeeechnically could solo all of fiction...if some writer said so.

Like, Quinten Tarantino could just write an entire movie of FW Godzilla brutally slaying all of fiction with a katana and an atomic shotgun while smoking a cigar wrapped in Michael Bay's unwashed underwear.

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And he could even add a post-credits message of "he did all that because I said so." ;)
Last edited by ShinGojira14 on Mon Mar 27, 2023 8:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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Thanks for the response and kind words, LSD. I really appreciate it.

I actually did spend a good deal of quality time with my father for a few days in December thanks to a work-related trip he took, where I helped out with a project. Even without any hindsight, I'm very happy I went.

While I know I still have a lot to work on, I am genuinely proud of myself/my accomplishments these past few years, and I know my father was too. I'm sad he won't be there to see me finally graduate college (which will be this May), but at least he died knowing I would.
LSD Jellyfish wrote: Sun Mar 26, 2023 5:31 pm I think in regards to the woman, it's best to just let it go. Hard to, mind you, but there will be other people. I've been in that exact same frustrating situation before, and what I've realized is that when people start playing emotional games with you, then it's time to bounce. Friendzone, and the concept of it, can lead to very toxic mindsets, but I agree it's wrong for people to emotionally lead people down paths of thinking they are romantically avaiable or there is still a possibility for intimacy.
Yeah, I'm (at least vaguely) aware of the potential sexist connotations of the "friendzone" (actually, ignoring any of that, I find the term kind of cringeworthy). But like I said, we spent quite a good deal of time together, going out at least once-a-week during the school semester, texting all the time daily, having a barrage of in-jokes, and her visiting my house, meeting my family, etc. over summer. So I certainly don't think I was jumping to any radical conclusions by assuming she held certain feelings. But I'm sure there's a lesson to be learned here about assuming such things. I know I should have told her something sooner, albeit at the same time, she knew of my general awkwardness (being on the spectrum and not having been in any real relationship since high school). I kind of wonder if she figured I was too much of a blubbery wallflower to say anything about her going out with the other guy. But whatever. I guess I'm just taking out all of my frustration on this situation considering everything else has been so helpless. I hit the bottles pretty damn hard over Christmas Break upon seeing her hook up with that guy. Little did I know what would come in January...

And I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather, LSD. Even when there's little, if nothing, you can really do to help, I perfectly understand feeling bad about your not doing anything. That was kind of the situation with my uncle. My parents didn't want us (me and my sister) to even see him in the state he was in just before his death (just lying in his bed for a good week, pants soiled, waiting for death to come).

I mean, I guess if there's some sort of silver lining to all of these family-related deaths occurring in such short succession (apart from them not being prolonged), it's we won't have to deal with them later on. My grandfather (my father's father) died 2 years ago, on January 7, 2021...genuinely think him seeing the Jan. 6 insurrection on TV made his body say "fuck this". Like my uncle (noticing a family pattern here?), he just became a recluse in his last few years, just waiting to die in his own home. No doubt did his attitude cause my grandma a great deal of stress. So knowing he had little time left, my father made the concise effort to not replicate his father and brother's behaviors.

And unlike my uncle, who while not an inherently bad person, fucked up in just about every step of life, my father left behind a ton of loved ones/genuine admirers. A good 100+ people attended his celebration of life. For someone who always worried about not living up to his fullest potential, he did well for himself.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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After somehow evading it for years, I finally caught COVID-19. While my symptoms aren't terrible, they're bad enough that I haven't been able to sleep for two nights in a row. I didn't know it was possible to be this fucking tired.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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HedorahIsBestGirl wrote: Wed Mar 29, 2023 1:41 am After somehow evading it for years, I finally caught COVID-19. While my symptoms aren't terrible, they're bad enough that I haven't been able to sleep for two nights in a row. I didn't know it was possible to be this fucking tired.
Hang in there!
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Re: What ruined your day?

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HedorahIsBestGirl wrote: Wed Mar 29, 2023 1:41 am After somehow evading it for years, I finally caught COVID-19. While my symptoms aren't terrible, they're bad enough that I haven't been able to sleep for two nights in a row. I didn't know it was possible to be this fucking tired.
The tiredness is what makes it so bad. When I got Covid I kind of decided “oh this is the time to watch some stuff and relax I didn’t get around to”, so I tried watching NOPE. Every five minutes I felt like I was going to fall asleep, and paying attention to basic things was impossible. But I was coughing and felt too shitty to actually sleep. It was a nightmare.

Hope you recover quickly!
Spirit Ghidorah 2010 wrote: Sun Dec 03, 2023 4:54 pm Anno-san pleasures me more than Yamasaki-san.

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Re: What ruined your day?

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HedorahIsBestGirl wrote: Wed Mar 29, 2023 1:41 am After somehow evading it for years, I finally caught COVID-19. While my symptoms aren't terrible, they're bad enough that I haven't been able to sleep for two nights in a row. I didn't know it was possible to be this fucking tired.
I had it a few months ago and ended up with shivers, vomiting, 104 fevers, the whole works! Though i did keep my taste somehow.

I hope you feel better!
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Re: What ruined your day?

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HedorahIsBestGirl wrote: Wed Mar 29, 2023 1:41 am After somehow evading it for years, I finally caught COVID-19. While my symptoms aren't terrible, they're bad enough that I haven't been able to sleep for two nights in a row. I didn't know it was possible to be this fucking tired.
I hope you have a speedy recovery. Please do your best to protect your loved ones.

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Re: What ruined your day?

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Thanks guys, I'm finally starting to feel better today. Probably helps that I actually slept well last night after three nights of insomnia. Still have congestion, fatigue and a bit of a sore throat but the fever is long gone and I don't feel like a dead man walking anymore.
The wisest words ever spoken on TK: "When I Saw The Showa Movie's white My Friend's They seid WTF is This Your showing Me to Men Fighting In suit's they found At party city Butt when I Showed Them The Heisei film's they thoght They where pritty fun To Watch"

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Re: What ruined your day?

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Finding out that I have a 9 hour shift today and tomorrow. These just came out of nowhere and I don't understand why they are giving me these shifts. Hell, I was going to go watch

Added in 1 minute 35 seconds:
CrimsonBloodX wrote: Sun Apr 02, 2023 12:17 pm Finding out that I have a 9 hour shift today and tomorrow. These just came out of nowhere and I don't understand why they are giving me these shifts. Hell, I was going to go watch Shazam! Fury of the Gods tomorrow after my shift, but now I can't.
Added in 47 seconds:
Finding out that I have a 9 hour shift today and tomorrow. These just came out of nowhere and I don't understand why they are giving me these shifts. Hell, I was going to go watch Shazam! Fury of the Gods tomorrow after my shift, but now I can't.

Added in 2 minutes 59 seconds:
^Trying to edit my comment created this mess.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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The main event of WrestleMania.

Seriously, is this all that Triple H could come up with? For the head of the 'creativity' department, that was the least creative thing of all time, Roman is just a lazy, overglorified hog.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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Dealing with family constantly arguing to the point of shouting. Gonna be staying with a friend for a while.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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Chris Chan got fucking Bond
Showa Goji best Godzilla

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Re: What ruined your day?

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Got a new phone. Sad part it's my 4th one in the last 6 months. Don't get the Google Pixel 7 pro. When this one inevitably goes to shit I'll finally be able to get a different phone. Going back to Samsung after this debacle.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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Trying to go to sleep and suddenly feeling like shit. I think I must have drifted off and had a nightmare that I immediately forgot, because I got this weird feeling of fear and dread fixated around Smile, of all things. I mean, I'm sure it's going to be as scary as the hype, but it's a movie. Yeah. That faded, and I was left with a tingly, skin-crawling, goosebumps feeling that has held on a for a few hours now. That, and I'm just weak and tired from never having slept. I assume it's the result of a perfect storm of factors: wonky diet the last few days, more caffeine than I'm used to today, weather that keeps flipping between sun and rain, and not taking Benadryl for the first time in about a week. Bleh.
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Re: What ruined your day?

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I'm questioning some of my long-held beliefs in a way that makes the last fifteen years of my life feel like I've become a much, much worse human in the name of when I was trying to become a better person. It is becoming a recurring issue.
I used to be a lot more optimistic and outgoing, believe it or not. I used to actually be passionate about this stuff.

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Re: What ruined your day?

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JVM wrote: Sun Apr 16, 2023 8:55 pm I'm questioning some of my long-held beliefs in a way that makes the last fifteen years of my life feel like I've become a much, much worse human in the name of when I was trying to become a better person. It is becoming a recurring issue.
Well, what beliefs are you questioning?
Spirit Ghidorah 2010 wrote: Sun Dec 03, 2023 4:54 pm Anno-san pleasures me more than Yamasaki-san.

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Re: What ruined your day?

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JVM wrote: Sun Apr 16, 2023 8:55 pm I'm questioning some of my long-held beliefs in a way that makes the last fifteen years of my life feel like I've become a much, much worse human in the name of when I was trying to become a better person. It is becoming a recurring issue.
Oof, I feel this. I tried to become a better person in college and then again after college, and both times I feel like I got slightly better in some ways but much worse in others. Only in the last two years, with a good stable job and more time for self-reflection and self-improvement, do I feel like I've genuinely become a "better" person.

All this to say, it's never too late to change. You've probably heard that a million times but seriously, it's something I used to roll my eyes at but now I fully believe it. Just because your past efforts haven't worked the way you wanted them to doesn't mean you're always doomed to fail. Ruminating on past mistakes and failures, spiraling down that abyss of cynicism and self-loathing, blaming yourself for everything that's ever gone wrong in your life, it's all destructively futile. When you reflect on your mistakes, do so only to learn from them and avoid repeating them. I know that's all easier said than done but it's also the best way to break what can feel like a perpetual cycle and improve your situation.
The wisest words ever spoken on TK: "When I Saw The Showa Movie's white My Friend's They seid WTF is This Your showing Me to Men Fighting In suit's they found At party city Butt when I Showed Them The Heisei film's they thoght They where pritty fun To Watch"

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