K.W.C.E. #凸】♡】2021-aot-vltin-dy-LT←巨人 - Eren vs. Jean: Battle of the Bitch Babies

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K.W.C.E. #凸】♡】2021-aot-vltin-dy-LT←巨人 - Eren vs. Jean: Battle of the Bitch Babies

Post by KaijuX »

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VS.
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Arena:
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(To be replaced never)

Author: GodzillavsJason
Word Count: 16,918 words
Posted: February 27th, 2021
Continued from: KWCE Match #Spooks666
Uncensored: Read here

---

Everyone watched the psychotic psychic storm out of the mess hall, half of them shivering from fear, feeling a great deal of unease from the conflict. They were relieved Miki was departing from the cafeteria, but couldn’t help themselves being pinned down by that terror. Sasha held onto Shiro tightly, rubbing her hand over his fur while Armin cuddled up against Mikasa and Eren, quietly sobbing from the verbal abuse he received from Miki.

Others felt a variety of different feelings. Ymir, brewing with unbridled rage, holding Krista tightly, the tiny girl terrified by the outburst minutes ago. Bertholdt sat there dumbfoundedly while Reiner had a grin still painted on his face, feeling proud of “his man” for standing up for herself, and Connie was still deaf.

The silence was soon broken up with Reiner speaking up, “Weren’t Eren and Jean going to fight in the arena?”

“Oh, right, that…..” Eren surmised, shaking his head.

“Um….. you know…. do you have any idea where we left off?” Jean inquired, tapping his chin with his index finger, trying to remember where he left off on his argument with the Titan shifter.

“I….. I have no idea. I feel like we were really going somewhere with the argument, but whatsherface interrupted it,” Eren pointed out.

“I think her name was Mickey,” interjected Mikasa, before turning her attention to Jean, “And you were complaining how it was an unfair fight, because of Eren’s Titan abilities.”

“Right! That! Thank you, Mikasa!” Jean shouted happily, snapping his fingers while pointing at his comrade. “How the hell is this going to be a fair fight!? None of you can surely believe I can take him while he gets to roid himself out as a Titan!”

“Could always ask to see if anyone will help you?” Sasha suggested, tearing into the Servum with her teeth.

“I don’t think anyone will help me with something as trivial as this,” indicated Jean, feeling apprehensive about the possibility of taking a mech.

“He doesn’t have to, but I guess that just makes him a chickenshit on top of being a corpse,” Eren taunted, smirking at Jean’s cowardice.

“Oh!!!!!!” Nearly everyone in the hall shouted out.

“Oh shit! He got you good, Jean!” Reiner hollered out, raising his hand up for Eren, who immediately took up the offer and high fived him.

Jean grew a scowl bigger than he had ever before, he watched as a few of his comrades laughed at him, tormenting him. He didn’t know what he did to deserve their ridicule, but he wasn’t going to let it persist.

“You know what!?” screeched Jean, catching everyone’s attention.

“What?” Sasha asked, looking back up with a mouth full of food, thinking she was the one he was asking about.

“I do accept the challenge and I will get…. whatever I can to kick your sorry ass!” Jean proclaimed, stepping forward.

“Fine!” Eren shouted, taking a step closer, “Whatever you get, I’ll flatten it and then after that, I’m going to flatten your horse face.”

“Not if I slice that nape of yours off while you cry for mommy!” Jean mocked, once again taking another step.

“What did you say, you goddamn asshole!?” growled Eren, slamming his head against Jean’s.

“You heard me. Screaming for mommy, but she won’t be coming to save you,” Jean retaliated, his eyes piercing Eren’s.

“You piece of shit! I’m going to rip every piece of your body off one by one!” screamed Eren, his voice sounding monstrous.

The two stared each other down, neither of them backing down. Their bodies trembled, waiting for the other to strike. It would only be a matter of time now.

“Just kiss already!” Ymir shouted out, getting everyone to turn their attention to her. Eren and Jean’s faces immediately turned red from the embarrassing observation, both of them jumping back a few steps.

“Ymir!? What has gotten into you today!” Krista cried out.

“Just stating the obvious, as always,” clarified Ymir. “Either give us a show or just shut up. No one’s interested in their tantrums.”

“I’m glad someone is making sense,” Bertholdt murmured.

“Alright then, Friday, you’re dead!” Eren announced, shoving his finger onto Jean’s chest.

“Correction, you’ll be dead!” recompensed Jean.

“Um…. sorry to interject, but Friday is the carnival,” Armin announced.

“Shoot, you’re right, Armin,” Eren replied, rubbing his head. “Does Thursday work?”

“No, we all have to attend Rico’s one woman play of Mannequin,” Mikasa interjected.

“Hiana’s daughter is doing a one woman show? That’s pretty impressive for a toddler,” Sasha pointed out, taking another bite from her Servum.

“No, not that Riko. Rico, the silver haired lady, who’s always crabby about walls or something,” Jean replied, shivering at her constant barking of commands.

“Um…… dare I say tomorrow?” Eren stammered out, running out of options for the upcoming conflict.

“Tomorrow is the new arrivals and the greatest one of all! My cousin!” Reiner cheerfully exploded, shaking with excitement.

“Oh no, not little Hitler!” Betholdt moaned, putting his head down on the table, remembering all the times the girl had constantly pestered him.

“That’s right, my man!” Reiner yelled out excitedly.

“Let me guess, Tuesday is taco day?” sighed Jean.

“Nope! Tuesday is Tie day! Eat all the Thai food you want so long as you wear a tie!” Sasha proudly proclaimed, her stomach roaring with excitement.

“Great…..” Jean breathed out, facepalming himself.

“Please tell me Wednesday is good. I can’t take any more celebrations!” pleaded Eren, nearly dropping to his knees.

“Huh……” Armin muttered out, checking his calendar, “Wednesday is good!”

“Excellent!” Eren and Jean shouted out in unison. The two then turned back to each other, their glares resurrecting.

“Enjoy these last few days, Jean, because I’m going to enjoy ripping you to shreds,” Eren growled.

“Bold words for someone who will die!” Jean shouted back.

“Eren,” Mikasa voiced, placing her hand on his shoulder. “You’ll have plenty of time to play with Jean later. It’s time to do that thing we talked about earlier.”

“What thing?” questioned Eren, prompting Mikasa to raise an eyebrow, immediately causing his eyes to widen. “That! Well, Jean, I don’t have time to deal with your horseshit. I have better things to do.”

“Fine! See if I care! I have better things to do, too!” Jean retaliated, turning away to take his leave as Mikasa and Eren did.

“Man, Eren is so cool. He gets the girl when the fight hasn’t even begun. My man!” Reiner shouted out, feeling proud of his friend, a friend he treated as a little brother.

“Seriously, what is with you lately?” questioned Bertholdt.

“Guys! Did I miss Eren?” Asked an out of breath Hiana, swinging her head left and right, who had just barged into the mess hall.

“There’s still plenty of enchilada sauce!” Connie replied, completely missing the subject of the mother’s question.

Hiana looked at everyone, questioning her comrade’s out of the blue answer. “Don’t question it,” Ymir answered.

*****

“All right, Mr. Peanut!” Hange yelled out, slamming her hands onto the table, “If that’s even your real name!”

The mad Titan expert looked up at her captive, showing no signs of being intimidated. She had tried everything, removing his limbs several times, teasing him with several subjects to feast on, and even planting giant headphones on him with Susan’s voice only screaming “Kong! King Kong!”

Alas, nothing deterred the Titan, as all Peanut did was stare down at her. His mouth ever so drooling, with the thought of devouring her.

“Your capture got a lot of good people killed! So you better tell me the intel you’re carrying or else!” threatened Hange, grabbing an ultrasteel blade off the table and pointing it towards the five meter Titan.

Whether it be human or Titan, she always got her prisoners to crack. She glared at Peanut, who’s huge, bulbous eyes stared down at her, never leaving her from his sight. Its as if he wasn’t phased by her in any sort of way.

The two stared at each other for what seemed to be an eternity, but like all staring contests, one would have to falter eventually. “Oh, it’s hopeless!” cried Hange as she threw the blade across the room. She then collapsed onto the table, tears pouring from her eyes and flooding the table.

“Why won’t he crack!?” bawled Hange.

“Hey four-eyes!” a voice called out, causing her to launch her head from the desk and to turn around to see Levi standing at the doorway. His arms were crossed as he leaned against the frame of the door.

“Levi!” Hange happily exclaimed, but it was only momentarily as her mood soured, “And no, nothing has been discovered.”

“Yeah, I don’t care,” Levi replied, not even looking at her.

“Oh, then why are you here?” inquired Hange, “Surely there’s been a new discovery? A Titan attack perhaps?”

“No. Erwin wants us to prepare ourselves for the new recruits. They’ll be here within the hour,” answered Levi.

“Oh, well perhaps a distraction is what I need,” surmised Hange, getting up from the table and walking towards her friend.

“And Erwin specifically instructed me to tell you not to scare the recruits,” Levi announced, turning his eyes onto her, eliciting a stern look.

Hange blushed, sending her hand down dismissively, “He has nothing to worry about! I’ll be very courteous to our new friends! Ooh! Perhaps I’ll make my homemade tea!”

“Sure, why not?”

“You don’t seem very enthusiastic, Levi? What’s the matter?”

“Hange, I’m never happy,” murmured Levi, not feeling any sort of joy in these day to day tasks he was forced to take part in.

“Yes, but you could at least show some interest. What’s wrong?” Hange asked, putting her hand on his shoulder, lightly rubbing it.

He immediately brushed her away, eliciting a small frown from her, as he spoke, “With everything going on this week, I’ve already checked out.”

“Oh? Tell me more.” Hange grinned.

Levi simply sighed, “I’ll tell you on the way,”

Hange followed her friend’s command as they walked away from the torture room, leaving Peanut all by his lonesome. He watched as the two departed and once they were out of his sight, his eyes immediately trembled. Water poured from them while his mouth quivered. Finally, small murmurs escaped his maw, mourning the departure of his new friend.

***

The entirety of the Scout Regiment stood at firm as the ship containing their new recruits sailed towards the docking bay. Some could barely contain their excitement as some of these new arrivals contained friends and even loved ones while others were a bit apprehensive of their capabilities. Regardless, they all agreed they would give them a warm welcome and to show them why joining the Scout Regiment was the right decision to make.

The carrier docked and within minutes, the large door dropped down as hordes of people were discharged from the ship. They marched onto the dock, keeping a near blank expression on their faces as they looked at the Scouts saluting them. Making them feel welcome was the least each member of the regiment can do as they were about to enter a life of hell. However, some were elated to be here.

“Reiner! Reiner!” a small girl gleefully yelled out, pushing past the crowds of people and running towards the Scouts.

“Gabi!” Reiner hollered back, running towards his little cousin as he quickly wrapped her up in a massive bear hug. Gabi returned the gesture, wrapping her smaller arms around him while he spun around her.

Gabi giggled at the reunion as he set her down. She looked up at him while she bounced up and down. “I’m so glad I get to be with you! Killing those Eldian demons and….” Reiner slammed his hand onto Gabi’s mouth and waved his other hand in front of her.

“Not yet, Gabi. Not yet,” whispered Reiner, trying to prevent the others from knowing about their agenda. He didn’t want another Marco situation. It was something he and the others regretted doing, as despite his orders to kill everyone at the base, he did grow very attached to several of them. Convincing Gabi these people aren’t demons would be a hard task to accomplish, but it was something he’d hoped to achieve in time.

“Right! Gotta get the element of surprise first!” Gabi shouted, immediately pulling a musket out and shooting a nearby scout, eliciting a gurgled cry.

“Jesus Christ, Gabi!” Reiner screamed out, panicking at his cousin already causing a ruckus.

“Oh look, my friends!” announced Gabi as three teenagers approached the two already forgetting about the murder she just committed.

“Jeez Gabi, you could have waited,” the boy with the golden hair moaned, exhaustion hitting his voice hard.

“Not my fault you were too busy getting seasick,” retorted Gabi, punching her friend on the shoulder.

“Mind introducing me to your friends?” inquired Reiner, inspecting the three new arrivals.

“This squirt is Falco,” Gabi spoke, wrapping the boy around the neck.

“Hi, sir,” greeted Falco.

“Nice to meet you, little man,” Reiner greeted, shaking the boy’s hand.

“And if you ever need a letter mailed, I’m your man. I love mailing letters, because being a mailman is what I want to be when I grow up,” announced Falco, sharing his hopes and dreams with Reiner.

“Good for you my man!” Reiner yelled out, excitement vibrating in his neck as he felt elated by the boy’s dreams. He then offered a high five to the boy, who slowly raised his hand up, meeting the palm of the veteran scout’s hand.

Reiner slightly frowned at the boy’s high five, but immediately changed his feeling at the matter when he noticed he was a bit jittery. Likely due to transferring to a new base and being around a lot of people he didn’t know. The Titan Shifter decided to offer a few words of encouragement, “It’s okay my man! We’ll work on your high fives!”

“And this is Udo,” Gabi pointed out as the boy with glasses and black walked up to him, snapping Reiner’s attention away from Falco.

“ARE WE EXPENDABLE!?” screamed Udo, launching his arms at Reiner’s coat, shaking him to his bitter core.

“Woah, settle down my man!” Reiner spoke softly, putting his hands on him, trying to calm the new recruit down.

“WHAT HAPPENS TO US WHEN WE FINISH THE MISSION!? DO WE GET DISPOSED O….” Udo tried to scream out, but was immediately dispatched by Gabi with a hard punch to the back of the head, effectively knocking him unconscious.

“Sorry about that. He gets a little too excited,” apologized Gabi as she then turned to her final friend. Reiner looked at the girl with grey hair as she approached them with a frown on her face.

“And this is typical bored anime girl Zofia!” Gabi announced.

“That’s an oversimplification of things, Gabi, but whatever,” Zofia mumbled, taking a brief look at Reiner before focusing her attention elsewhere.

“It’s nice to meet all of you little dudes and the good news is that I get to be your Captain!” announced an elated Reiner, who was looking forward to teaching the four teenagers.

“Yes! Not even the first day of training and I get the best captain of all time!” cheered Gabi, hugging her cousin once more.

Reiner laughed at his little cousin’s eagerness, patting her on the head. “I don’t know if I would call myself the best captain.”

Gabi snapped her head upwards with a scowl blanketing her entire face, her teeth chattering as if they were ready to tear someone’s flesh off. “Who said you weren’t the best? I’ll kill them!”

“Uh…. no one… just making a joke,” stuttered Reiner, not wanting Gabi to shoot yet another person.

“Good, you had me worried there,” beamed Gabi, her grin making a return as if her anger was entirely nonexistent.

“You kids must be hungry, so let’s grab a bite to eat. My treat,” Reiner announced, trying to change the subject as soon as possible to get away from Gabi’s rapid changing of emotions.

The kids cheered as they followed Reiner towards the mess hall as Gabi asked one final question. “Is Bertholdt still simping for Annie?”

Reiner let out a belly filled laugh, turning towards his little cousin and asked “When does he have time to do anything else?”

Gabi then joined in on laughing with her big cousin as they continued to make their way to the cafeteria.

With a tug on her sleeve, Hiana looked down at her daughter trying to get her attention. “What’s the matter, Riko?”

“Where’s auntie?” the little girl probed, eliciting a sadden look to her mother.

“She should be here any minute. She might have gotten stuck at the back of the line,” reasoned Hiana, but in reality was unsure about whether or not she would be able to arrive this time. It had been a while since she last saw her as she was in desperate need of someone she could rely on to talk to. Most importantly someone to talk to about Eren.

“Perhaps you two should have checked from behind!” a sweet, cheerful voice called out, putting her hands in front of Riko’s eyes.

Riko removed the hands from her eyes and turned around to face a woman with long black hair, her appearance almost mirroring her mother’s except her eyes being more relaxed.

“Auntie Pieck!” Riko shouted, wrapping her arms around her aunt as Pieck did the same for her niece.

“It’s good to see you both again,” Pieck spoke softly, nearly closing her eyes.

“The feeling is mutual,” replied Hiana embracing her sister.

“Howdy sir! On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your overall travel experience?” asked a scout holding a pen and paper.

“Piss off you island cunt!” a man with combed over hair shouted, pushing the scout away, walking past the group. Hiana immediately covered her daughter’s ears, preventing her from hearing the new arrival’s cursing.

“Oh, sorry…” apologized Pieck. “That’s Porco. He can be a bit grouchy at times.”

Hiana nodded. “Just please get him to not say such colorful language in front of Riko.”

“I may need to sneak some stuff in his food,” Pieck whispered, winking at Hiana while pointing towards some stuff hidden away in her jacket pocket.

Minutes have passed since the new recruits arrived as they continue to mingle, something Commander Erwin Smith noticed. The mingling seemed to put everyone in high spirits, which was something that was desperately needed around here. Orientation, however, wouldn’t be complete until he made a speech inducting them into the regiment. The commander stood firm at the podium before everyone, clearing his throat, which immediately got everyone’s attention.

“To our new arrivals! I understand your decision to be here was a hard one, but I speak for everyone when I say each and everyone of you is brave for being here. From this day forward, you are all members of the scout regi….” Erwin’s announcement was interrupted with Hange jumping on the stage, grinning at everyone below her.

“Yo captain, give me the mic for a second,” spoke Hange, slightly pushing her commanding officer out of the way. “Levi just informed me that Eren and Jean are going to have a fight on Wednesday! Isn’t that awesome!?”

“Who the hell are they!?” a newcomer in the crowd cried out.

“Nevermind that! I’m starting a betting pool! Twenty dollars for Eren!” announced Hange, her voice ecstatic at the prospect of the incoming community event.

“Oh shit! Put me down on five-hundred for Eren!” Erwin beamed, pulling out all the cash he had from his wallet and giving it to Hange.

Several members of the crowd soon followed suit, lining up to dump their money into the bucket while throwing in who they’re betting on.

Nearly everyone chanted for Eren, which immediately made the Titan shifter smirk. He looked over at Armin and Mikasa, and spoke “They love me.”

“I’m pretty sure it has less to do with them loving you, and more or less having to do with you having better odds,” surmised Armin.

“Nah. They love Eren, but not as much as me,” commented Mikasa, pulling Eren closer to her, ensuring no one would get near her precious man.

Meanwhile, Jean’s shoulders dropped. He didn’t expect a lot of support, but the amount of encouragement Eren was receiving was disheartening. With a huge sigh, Jean shuffled into the complex, not wanting to hear Eren gain anymore praise.

Hiana kept a watchful eye at Eren who was being surrounded by several people being flooded with praise. She exhaled softly, frowning at not having the courage to approach him with this many people around or to even be alone with him. The single mother admired the Titan shifter greatly for always wanting to do the right thing, protecting his friends and for his looks.

“He the one?” Pieck asked, gaining her sister’s attention.

“Yeah,” muttered Hiana.

“You can tell me all about him, so I can help think of a solution for the two of you,” spoke Pieck, offering her sister a smile and her support.

“Okay, where do I even begin?” mouthed Hiana, as she began to start her tale on how she developed feelings for Eren. All of these details were something Pieck was looking forward to greatly, because she always loved helping people in their time of need and was a bit of a romantic herself.

***

“Jean? Jean!? Where are you buddy!” Sasha called out for her friend repeatedly as her and Connie wandered through the halls.

“I wonder where he could be?” mused the gluttonous scout.

“Sorry Sasha, the teacher says I can’t share my answers!” Connie blurted out, completely missing what Sasha just inquired about.

“Well, that’s not very nice of him,” snorted Sasha, annoyed how the teacher didn’t encourage teamwork. She needed the help of others as classwork wasn’t her strongest skill set. Nonetheless, this answer didn’t help with her search. “But that’s not important right now. We need to find Jean.”

“I already told you, Bruce Willis was dead the whole time!” Connie blared out, annoyed he had to tell Sasha the plot twist for the fifth time this week.

“No he wasn’t! Where are you getting that from?” barked Sasha, completely adamant on the idea Bruce Willis was dead during the events of the film.

“Oh my god, Sasha! He was dead the whole time!” Jean’s voice echoed through the hallway from a room not so distant from his two friends.

“Jean, is that you?” asked Sasha.

“Yes….” muttered a defeated Jean, as his two friends entered the laboratory he stationed himself in. They entered the room filled with several operating tables, jars filled with various chemicals and captured lifeforms and even cages holding valuable specimens. The two have never set foot in this room as their faces were blanketed with astonished looks.

Still, they couldn’t let sightseeing get in the way of helping their friend. Sasha briefly looked around until she saw Jean resting his head on a table. Concern immediately took over as she hated to see her good friend like this. Sasha approached Jean and put a hand on his back, lightly rubbing it.

“Everything okay, champ?” asked Sasha, trying to make her voice as comforting as possible.

“Don’t patronize me, Sasha,” muttered Jean, whose voice was muffled by the desk he still planted his face on.

“Oh, I….. I’m sorry,” Sasha stuttered, taken back by Jean’s dismissal of her trying to cheer him up.

“No, I’m sorry,” Jean spoke, lifting his head up to face his friends. “Just going through the motions of realizing how fucked I am.”

“There’s still time to learn the banjo!” Connie blurted out, attempting to bring some peace to Jean.

“Jesus Christ, Connie,” groaned Jean, who immediately facepalmed himself shortly after. He then turned back to Sasha, “I ordered some hearing aids for Connie, so make sure he gets them, because this is going to get annoying really fast.”

“That’s nice of you,” murmured Sasha, rubbing her friend on the back while offering him a warm smile.

“Yeah, well, I figured I’d at least do one good deed before I get stepped on. Not like I can get my own giant monster.”

“Wait, giant monster. I just got an idea!” blared Sasha, lifting her finger up.

“What?”

“Why not borrow one of the mechs? I’m sure our friends will let you borrow one.”

“Sasha, that’s brilliant! Maybe I won’t be dead after all!” Jean exclaimed happily, jumping from his seat and immediately wrapping her in a huge hug.

“Well, this is unexpected, but nice,” commented Sasha, as she returned the gesture, both of them feeling the warm embrace of each other’s touch.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta acquire a combatant for this to be a proper match!” Jean proudly proclaimed, marching off to the hangars.

“And to reward myself with these tasty looking mushrooms,” Sasha commented as she picked up the jar and began to open it.

Jean immediately stopped in his tracks, hearing what his friend just said. Last he recalled, several members of the scouts were infected by consuming those mushrooms and had to either be killed or quarantine to prevent the spread. Now, he never liked the idea of keeping the mushrooms, but knew it had to be done in the hopes of a cure. His eyes widened when he saw a couple of mushrooms wrapped in Sasha’s hand inches away from her mouth.

“Sasha, don’t!” screamed Jean, terror completely overtaking his voice and eyes, as it was too late. The mushrooms were thrown into her maw as she began to chew them with glee. Tears flooded his eyes as he was not only unsure about winning the fight, but he now just lost a dear friend of his. One of the most important people in his life.

Then, as if he were snatched away from his thoughts of Sasha’s impending doom, he heard her screaming, as if it were bloody murder. He looked over to see Sasha hunched over, spitting the chewed up remains of the mushrooms. Before Jean could do anything to help alleviate her pain, he watched as she started punching herself in the stomach repeatedly.

“Oh god! This tastes like shit! Ah!!!!!” Sasha cried out between coughs as she now was on all fours.

“How was this possible? Everyone who ate the mushrooms grew an overwhelming addiction to them.” Jean mused, completely baffled at how Sasha was such a pained reaction to these mushrooms.

“Why are people raving about this!?” screamed Sasha, curling herself up into a ball. “This is…. is…. who could think of such a horrible snack!”

Sasha’s hand spasmed all around the floor as if it were searching for something. She looked over to the opened cabinets and saw a vial of blue liquid. Without any hesitation, she snatched it up and inspected it.

“Need to wash it down. Need to wash it down!” Sasha panicky yelled out, but Jean was the wiser when he saw what the vial was labeled.

“Sasha, no! That’s the H-Man! Jean screamed out, but his cries were ignored as she opened the tube and poured it down her throat.

Her troubles were now long behind her or so she thought.

Sasha then elicited a banshee like scream as she throttled all over the floor, gagging at the taste of the liquid she just ingested. Unlike the consumption of the Matango, Jean no longer had any concern for his friend whatsoever. Instead, it was of annoyance.

“Are you doing this on purpose or are you in actual pain?” inquired Jean, frowning down upon her.

Sasha instantly stopped rolling around the ground and looked back at him with a neutral expression as if all pain ceased to exist. “A bit of both.”

“Right…. I’m just going to do my thing and you continue being you,” spoke Jean, as he turned away from his friend’s antics as Sasha immediately went back to writhing in pain on the floor. Her screams no longer affected Jean whatsoever as he had a mission to fulfil.

To kick Eren’s ass.

***

“And that’s about it,” summarized Hiana, spending the past hour talking to her sister about her crush. Even going into every bit of detail of Eren’s schedule, behavior, and his rantings. All of which still enticed the single mother to this day.

“Someone’s in love,” Pieck hummed while performing jazz hands.

Hiana rolled her eyes in response. “I already made that clear, Pieck.”

“I know. It’s just fun to tease you, but nonetheless, go and make small talk. Ask if there’s anything the two of you can do together.”

“Well, there is the carnival,” Hiana brought up, knowing it would be a good place to make a proper move onto him.

“There you go! Now go talk to him!” encouraged Pieck, giving her sister a small push towards the door to their room.

“Right! I’m going to do it!” announced Hiana, marching out of the room and into the hallway where she found the Titan traversing through.

“Eren!” Hiana called out, gaining the Titan shifter’s attention as he turned around to face her.

“Hiana! It’s good to see you. How are you?” greeted Eren. He always liked Hiana and wanted to get to know her, but was never able to due to different schedules, getting into arguments with Jean, and Mikasa pulling him away for their special sessions. Eren was certainly entranced by her. He just wished he had more time with her, but now was certainly a chance to remedy those missed opportunities.

Hiana, fully ready to state her intentions with Eren, went to speak but something was immediately wrong! The words she was about to convey were stuck in her throat. She tried with all of her might to speak, but all that could come out was a stutter.

“I…. I…..”

Eren slightly tilted his head, confused at her sudden behavior, but at the same time was worried about her. He took a step forward and asked softly, “Everything okay?”

“I…. I… do…. do.. you …. you…. want… want…”

“Do I want to do what?” inquired Eren, a bit nervous at what Hiana was trying to suggest, but nonetheless was looking forward to the answer, whatever that may be.

Hiana couldn’t take it anymore. Her mind broke as if it short circuited, to which she immediately did the only thing her brain can conjure up. The single mother unbuttoned her shirt and before Eren could comprehend what was going on, she snatched up his hand and made him grasp her breast.

“Hi… Hiana!” shouted Eren, taken quickly by surprise by Hiana’s gesture. He didn’t disapprove as he enjoyed the feel she offered to him, but was certainly perplexed by it.

“I have no idea if I should be turned on, scared or even both. Just one thing is clear: don’t mention this to Mikasa.”

However, Eren couldn’t ponder it any further as heard several footsteps entering the room. He looked over to see Reiner, who’s mouth nearly dropped to the floor, his eyes expanding in amazement. It was as if he just witnessed something life changing. Something truly special.

“My… FUCKING MAN!” Reiner screamed at the top of his lungs in full blown excitement. He rushed over to Eren, immediately snatching him up from Hiana. Reiner placed his fellow Titan shifter on his shoulders as Gabi and her friends made themselves known.

Right away the five jumped around all over the corridor, chanting, “Eren! Eren! Eren!”

“Ere…. Eren…” stuttered Hiana, upset at him being taken away by Reiner and his friends. Eren looked back at Hiana with sorrow, clearly showing his intent of wanting to be with her, but it was all for naught. Reiner kept Eren locked up with an iron grip as he continued to parade him down the hallway.

All Hiana could do was watch as the group disappeared while Eren’s name kept getting repeated more and more. She let out a deep sigh of deep disappointment as her shoulders sank down. Pieck put her hand on her sister’s shoulder, giving her a small smile, trying to offer some comfort to her.

“We’ll get them next time,” declared Pieck, giving her a small smile.

Hiana dropped a tear as she let out a few sniffles, upset about her failure to ask Eren out on a date.“I screwed up badly, didn’t I?”

“Next time just don’t unbutton your shirt and force him to feel you up, okay?” spoke Pieck, giving her some advice she desperately needed. Even though the Titan Shifter surmised it was something she’d never thought it would be something that had to be said. Nonetheless, Pieck was going to see through her task to the end even if it meant Hiana likely embarrassing herself even further.

***

“So, you think you can let me borrow Kiryu for a few hours?” Jean asked, putting his hands together as he was desperate to have any sort of arsenal at his disposal.

“I wish I could, but Kiryu doesn’t really respond well to anyone but me,” Akane answered, taking a brief look at her mech before resuming her attention back to Jean.

“Sure, but weren’t there other people who piloted Kiryu in your absence?” reasoned Jean, hoping it would be enough to sway the pilot into letting him borrow it.

Akane rubbed her head slowly, as she mentally prepared herself to explain to the scout why it was such a bad idea to even consider such a thing. “It wasn’t pretty. Some got injured, some couldn’t prevent Kiryu from going berserk, and poor Chujo’s nephew.”

Jean gulped, hearing the tragic fates several pilots had to endure. A part of him didn’t want to know what happened, but if he were to pilot Kiryu, he needed to know every detail. Even if it wasn’t pretty, as he then reluctantly asked, “What happened to Chujo’s nephew?”

Akane didn’t want to reveal the truth, but knew it had to be done. She didn’t want anyone to think less of Kiryu, but if it meant saving both of their lives, then so be it. “Kiryu apparently didn’t like the fact he was trying to replace me.”

Jean’s eyes widened in shock, completely baffled at how a mech could express jealousy. “Wait, what?”

“Yeah, once I took a second look at his dossier, we had a shocking amount of similarities. We both loved giant mechs, have some form of depression and our bullies were attracted to us,” listed Akane, still in complete astonishment at how such a comparison could even be made. She normally wasn’t a believer in a higher power, but often thought if there was one, then they were incredibly lazy to create two people with nearly identical personalities.

“Was he intentionally trying to copy you or was it just a coincidence?” Jean inquired, gaining Akane’s attention once.

“Good question, because this happened when I had to leave for a few weeks,” explained Kiryu’s pilot.

“He had a name, right?” Jean asked, trying to elicit some sympathy for the poor engineer.

“You know, I have no idea. I guess he’s just one of those people you tend to forget, so I just called him Chujo’s nephew,” elucidated Akane, clarifying her stance on her supposed substitute.

“Um… right, so that’s still a no?” Jean asked, trying to gage whether or not Akane had changed her mind into letting him borrow her mech. He felt bad for whatshisface, but couldn’t let sympathies get in the way of the upcoming duel. If he did perish, however, he would play twenty questions with him, and that’s even if there is such a thing as an afterlife.

“Sadly, yes,” answered Akane, giving him once more a sympathetic look.

“It was worth a shot,” sighed Jean as he turned to leave, planning his next step to acquire a mech.

“If it’s any consolation, I’ll be rooting for you. Someone needs to teach the brat some manners.” consoled Akane, giving the searching scout a warm smile.

“Thanks… I really appreciate it,” spoke Jean, returning the gesture.

As soon as Jean left, Kiryu glanced down at Akane and let out a small roar. The screens around them lit up displaying a message for his pilot.

“I would have been fine letting him control me. Eren does need an asswhooping.”

“And let someone else control you? No way! I’m still having to make you forgot that whiny bullshit Chujo’s nephew and the Shobijin put in your head about resting in peace.”

“Akane, you have to let me go. It’s been sixty-seven years.”

“Hey! We made a pact! Both of us are getting through life happily! We just need to find you something that makes you happy!”

“Resting at the bottom of the ocean is what’ll make me happy”

“I’m just going to ignore that and you find a pretty lady instead,” voiced Akane, creating a Tinder account for her best friend through her phone.

***

“Hey guys!” Takuya Sasaki yelled out, causing his three subordinates to turn and face him, halting their repairs on the mech that stood before them.

“What’s happening boss man?” hollered Kazuma, with a huge smile on his face, hearing the glee in his captain’s voice.

“This chump wants to borrow Super Mechagodzilla!” laughed the captain, eliciting a laugh from Kazuma and Sonezaki while Catherine remained stoic.

“Everyone knows it takes four people to pilot it!” Sonezaki added, slapping himself on the knee, reeling with laughter..

“The odds of Jean surviving would be one thousand nine-hundred thirty three to one,” announced Catherine as her three co-pilots turned to her.

“Um….. we still got to work on your humor, Cath,” Kazuma spoke, giving her a pat on the back. “But you’re getting better at it.”

“Acknowledged. I will work harder on it to satisfy my friends.”

“Okay, I get it,” Jean spoke, annoyed at the team making fun of him, as he threw his hands up. “I didn’t know it took more than one person to it, but you didn’t have to act like dicks about it.”

Jean turned away as the Mechagodzilla team continued to laugh, their laughs deafening every other noise around him. Then, a thought exploded in his mind. His mouth curved upwards, the words forming together very nicely.

“At least I won’t have to pilot a mech three seconds from a diabetic coma!” shouted Jean, his words immediately as the whole team except for Catherine lowered their heads in sadness. The insult struck hard, with their mech being able to provide the firepower to level a city in seconds, but not enough to destroy criticism.

“Suckers,” mouthed Jean, walking out of the hangar with a smile on his face, satisfied at getting a good roast in.

***

“This is my mech!” Yuki screamed, his throat ringing rapidly while he was running all around Moguera, wiping it down to give it a pristine shine. A shine that’ll outclass even the more powerful of mechs. “There are many like it, but this one is mine!”

Yuki threw the cloth down, as he then pulled a mop out and began cleaning its gigantic, orange eyes. “Without me this mech cannot kill Godzilla! Without it I cannot kill Godzilla!”

With each thrust, Yuki mopped harder and harder, speaking the next part of his mantra.“Killing Godzilla will be the only thing that’ll give us meaning in life! Without it we are useless!”

“Uh.. hi….” Jean greeted, giving the temperamental soldier a small wave.

Yuki shot daggers at Jean, his eyes piercing into his soul. Jean had ruined his hourly mantra, boiling his blood. This was something he could not tolerate whatsoever.

“Get out! Get the hell out!” screeched Yuki, pulling out a machine gun and firing it at Jean.

“Oh my god!” Jean cried out, speeding out of the third hangar while bullets followed him. He ran down throughout the hallway, with the bullets still chasing him, narrowly dodging each one.

“How are they still here!?” screamed Jean, tears in his eyes, completely baffled at their travel distance.

He had to think fast before one of them inevitably struck him. Without giving it a second’s thought, he entered the door nearest to him. Jean quickly held down the door as the bullets made their impact on the door. Each one pressing harder and harder on the door, nearly knocking him over, but he prevailed. Soon, his nightmare was over and the bullets ceased.

“I guess he returned to his creepy mantra,” surmised Jean, letting himself drop the ground as he rested his head on the damaged door. With another deep breath, he glanced up, curious as to know what room he ended up in. His eyes scanned the chamber, noting piles upon piles of discarded items ranging from rotted food to scraps of metal. The whole room disgusted him as his nose was filled with rotten smells. He nearly started to gag, but something caught his eye. Something standing at ninety meters tall.

A small smirk grew on his face, rubbing his chin admiring the sight before him. “I’m still likely going to die, but at least it won’t be pathetic.”

***

“I can hear again! It’s a miracle!” screamed a joyful Connie, bouncing up and down with the successful installation of his hearing aids.

“Now you don’t have to scream at the top of your lungs,” pointed out Sasha, overjoyed with her best friend’s recovery.

“Say, we should get some of that enchilada sauce to celebrate,” beamed Connie, rubbing his hands together.

“Ooh! Now you’re talking!” hummed Sasha, as she began to drool at their upcoming feast.

“Guys!” announced Jean, bursting through the door they were about to come out of.

“Hey Jean! Connie got his hearing aids!” Sasha announced gleefully.

“That’s wonderful!” Jean spoke, his smile still planted on his face. “But listen, I found something that may help against Eren. I just need to know if you guys are willing to help me put it back together.”

“Sure thing, man! Anything for my homie!” voiced Connie as the two of them rubbed hands and pounded their fists together.

“But first, enchilada sauce,” voiced Sasha, pointing at her two good friends.

“I could go for some enchilada sauce,” announced Jean, rubbing his stomach.

“What are we waiting for? Let’s go!” squawked Connie as the group made their way towards the mess hall, but before they could get very far, something dawned on Sasha. It was as if she was leaving behind a part of herself.

“My candy!” cried Sasha, racing over back to the table while her friends turned around to see what the commotion was all about. They watched her fumbling around the table for her favorite box of candy, but something peculiar didn’t add up. Maybe it was the thought of enchilada sauce that didn’t make them see it sooner, but the thing they finally realized was out of the ordinary truly scared them.

It was Gabi, standing at the other side of the room, pointing a musket towards Sasha’s stomach! The little girl had a devilish smile on her while Jean and Connie’s eyes widened in horror. Her finger seconds away from pulling the trigger open as their mouths quivered, trying to unlock the strength to warn Sasha.

“Dammit! I dropped my Reese’s Pieces!” Sasha moaned out, scrambling to save her treasured comrade.

Then, as if on cue, Gabi pulled the trigger, her mouth in perfect synchronization. “Nighty night!” The bullet erupted, racing towards its intended target while the little girl began to giggle with glee at the thought of a fountain of blood erupting from Sasha’s stomach.

“Sasha, look out!” Jean and Connie screamed out, tears welling in their eyes at her impending doom.

Their cries fell on deaf ears to her as she was more concerned with her candy’s fate. In any hope of saving her prized possession, Sasha dropped to the ground, landing on her stomach while the bullet zoomed above her and past her two friends.

Alas, it was too late. The damage was done. The box of candy collapsed on the ground as its remaining contents scattered all over the floor.

“My candy!” bawled Sasha, tears immediately flooding the floor. She then curled herself up in a ball, huffing and puffing at the loss of her treasured friend.

It wasn’t the only noise they heard though, but one belonging to the bullet making an impact. Connie and Jean turned around to find where the bullet hit, and to their horror, Levi stood behind them. A bullet size hole in the middle of his forehead materialized in front of them. Blood poured out of his wound and not even a second later, he dropped to the ground.

A man who may have not loved a lot of people, but one who was loved by everyone was slain by an ungrateful brat who treats everyone who loved her like garbage. With her assassination complete, despite it being the wrong target, jumped for joy and soon flossed in celebration.

“BANG! BANG! You’re dead mister!” Gabi gleefully yelled out, and soon bolted out of the room, continuing her celebratory cry. “That’s ten for ten!”

“Levi!” Jean screamed out, tending to his dead captain, cradling him in his arms.

“Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT!” Connie cried out, putting his hands on his hands, pacing around panicking about the situation we’re in.

“What are we going to do?” sobbed Sasha, still retaining her ball like shape, mourning the loss of her precious candy.

“Only one thing we can do,” announced Jean, lifting Levi’s body. “We take him to Hange. She’ll know what to do.”

***

“I’m sorry, but there’s nothing I can do for him. He’s gone,” Hange answered bluntly, glancing over at the captain’s body currently laid out on the operating table.

“Please! You have to do something! He’s one of the reasons why people are invested with this place!” pleaded Jean, slamming his hands on the table.

“Again, he’s dead and I have far more pressing matters on my plate right now,” Hange pointed out.

“What about my candy? Can you still save it?” Sasha squealed, barging through her friends, holding out the crumbled up box in front of the section commander.

Hange looked down at the box, her mouth slightly open as she gave her a look of annoyance. The section commander glanced at Jean and Connie with confusion as they too shared her thoughts on Sasha’s dilemma.

“Sasha, that’s just a box. Your feelings for it are not real,” Hange answered, her voice deadpanned at her subordinate’s request.

“They’re real to me!” screamed Sasha, frothing at the mouth, angry at how Hange did not consider her feelings valid.

“Sasha, just think of the sauce. The sauce!” Connie spoke softly into Sasha’s ear, eliciting a smile back onto her face. It was as if the box of candy no longer mattered to her.

“Still, there’s nothing I can do about Levi. I’m sorry,” Hange reiterated much to the disappointment of the three scouts.

“Well, that’s a shame,” spoke Jean as if a lightbulb went off in his head, changing his mood altogether.

“What is?” inquired Hange.

“Right before the bullet made its impact, he told me you were his best friend and how he would love to spend time with you at the carnival,” explained Jean, watching as her eyes grew larger and larger to the point where they nearly bursted out of her head.

“He… he did?” quivered Hange, barely able to contain her excitement.

“Oh yeah. He was raving it about!” Jean exclaimed, but stopped himself soon afterward. “Just a shame there’s nothing you can do about bringing him back.”

“Oh yes there is!'' shrieked Hange, lunging past the three scouts, nearly knocking them over. She landed right on the operating table, snatching up the tools necessary for the operation. “You’re not staying dead on me! We got a date to attend to!”

The three scouts watched the intensive process Hange was submitting the dead captain’s body to, as by each passing second, it got more and more intense. Intense to the point where none of them could even begin to describe the detail that was going into the procedure. It was as if they were a hivemind, all deciding to back away very slowly and to perform the tasks they needed to do. All of them cringing in horror at Hange’s cackling, a noise they could go without hearing for the rest of their lives.

***

“Ow!” hissed Eren, turning his head up to Mikasa. “Can you be a bit more gentle?”

Mikasa paused, pressing her hands slightly softer on Eren’s chest, as she leaned her head closer to his. “Eren, we’ve done this several times. Pain is part of the process and I thought you were a power bottom?”

“No shit, but I have a fight tomorrow and I’d rather not be sore in the morning,” growled Eren, nearly biting his lip.

“Of course,” spoke Mikasa, resuming their normal routine, pushing her body up and down on her best friend. His deep breaths motivated her to keep going more and more. She enjoyed these sessions as it helped her and Eren relax between missions. It was something she lived for and hoped they would have many more to come.

“Uh, question?” spoke Armin, sitting firmly on the bed. His eyes widened in horror at the display before him as his best friends turned their attention to him. “Why are you making me watch?”

“Armin, buddy! This is all part of the routine! None of this would be possible without you,” spoke Eren, giving the strategist a thumbs up.

“And I just like it when someone watches,” clarified Mikasa, immediately going to push her body up and down onto the Titan shifter’s frame.

“Um, okay, ew. So…. how about the fight tomorrow? You think you’re able to defeat Jean?” inquired Armind.

“Pfft!” laughed Eren, nearly knocking Mikasa off of him.

“Careful!” cried Mikasa, regaining her composure..

“Sorry,” Eren apologized, before responding to Armin, baffled at how he could ask a question as preposterous as horseface beating him. “What kind of question is that? I can easily take on Jean!” declared Eren.

“In sheer strength yeah, but Jean is known to be crafty and who knows what he has up his sleeve?” Armin cogiated, trying to go over every possibility for the fight. Both Eren and Jean were good friends of his, but if he had to choose, he would side with Eren. As, after all, they’ve been friends since childhood, they’ve gone through nearly everything together. He couldn’t just abandon him now, so he did what he was best at by forming strategies.

“I think your best strate….” Armin spoke but was immediately silenced by Eren waving his hand dismissively.

“Armin, Armin. Just go with the flow….” Eren tried to explain, but felt a twisting pain on his chest. His hiss soon turned into a scream of bloody murder. “Dammit Mikasa! That was my nipple!”

“Sorry….” Mikasa apologized, her face blushing red with embarrassment, before moving her hand away from his nipple and back onto his stomach.

She went back to her normal routine as Eren went back to his explanation, “There’s nothing to worry about, Armin. Jean will just be paste on the floor and we’ll all be reveling in the afterparty.”

“I… suppose you’re right,” sighed Armin, giving up on reasoning with Eren. He just had to make a mental note of taking something during the fight, so he wouldn’t lose his mind over two of his friends killing each.

“And done!” Mikasa announced, pushing herself off of Eren. Both of them were drenched in sweat after their intense physical session. It was tiring yet exhilarating, but it was needed to help keep them in shape. For Mikasa, it was about maintaining her strength while Eren did it to keep his core intact.

“Those pushups you do on me really hit the spot!” spoke Eren, feeling overjoyed about his muscles feeling relaxed.

“Mhm….. push ups really are a great physical activity,” murmured a relaxed Mikasa, closing her eyes as she felt more composed than ever before. As if she could take on fifty Titans without breaking a sweat.

“Right…….” stuttered Armin, feeling incredibly awkward at the situation he was forced to be involved in. “I’m going to freshen up before we attend the Tie Day dinner.”

“Armin, wait!” Mikasa called out, causing the strategist to stay in place.

“Yeah?” Armin gulped, fearful at the next disturbing task Mikasa wanted him to partake in.

“You forgot about our daily shower together,” purred Mikasa, looking forward to holding her friends close while the warm water rained down on their bodies. The portion of their session that really, really brought them closer together, almost as if their bodies merged into one.

“Goddamnit,” moaned Armin, tears flooding his eyes, as he did not want to go through that portion of the session yet again.

***

“Well, old champ. That’s the best I can do,” muttered Hange, wiping the sweat off her forehead. “I guess you won’t be taking me to the carnival after all.”

She looked down at the corpse of her best friend, with several tools laying beside him. Hange tried everything, but they made no noticeable difference. The only thing that worked was stitching the wound back together and placing a Hello Kitty band-aid over it.

Hange frowned as she poured herself a glass of black tea, brooding over her failures. She peered over to Peanut still bound in his chains. “Shall we get back to our date?” murmured Hange, putting down her cup and hoisting a rocket launcher over her shoulder.

“HOLY SHIT!” Levi screamed out, nearly launching himself out of the operating table. Hange let out a scream of her own, spooked by her friend’s resurrection as she accidentally fired the rocket, causing it to collide with a wall.

“Ah, Levi! You’re alive! Thank God!” cheered Hange, rushing over to embrace him.

“Woah! Don’t even thank that jackass!” yelled Levi, shooting a glare at her, forcing her to stand in place.

“What, why? You’re alive, so I imagine it’s a miracle from God, or maybe you’ll want to admit I’m a good doctor,” mused Hange, winking at the captain.

“No…. hell no… neither of you are to thank!” proclaimed Levi, pushing himself off the table.

“Woah! What are you thinking?!” Hange yelled out, grabbing a hold of her patient. “You can’t just get up after being shot in the head!”

“I can and I’m not sticking around to go through it again. And I’m not going back to Heaven!” declared Levi, pushing her off of him.

“Wait, there’s an afterlife?” Hange asked, prompting Levi to nod. Before he even knew it, she nearly pounced on him while drooling, “Tell me all about it! Down to the tiniest itty bitty detail!”

“Get off me, woman!” roared Levi, pushing his friend off him once more.

“But…. but… I have to know! Just tell me!” pleaded Hange, her hands forming together almost as she was praying. The sight, however, disgusted Levi, as he still felt the horror he encountered just minutes ago.

“Okay, okay. Just stop that,” voiced Levi, causing Hange to stand up straight and to be attentive about what he was about to say. “All there really is to say is that Heaven is so, so filthy! Every cloud is littered with garbage and dust bunnies! The angels just expose themselves to each other and throw down more garbage! Then, God, he was the worst part! He just sat down on a La-Z-Boy recliner, but the recliner part was missing! He just propped his feet on a tower of old, discarded pizza boxes and watched Big Bang Theory twenty-four seven!”

From his outburst, Levi nearly broke down, but managed to retain the strength to keep him upright. Still, his experience in heaven was a far, far traumatic one. One that outclassed any horror he had experienced before.

“Wait,” spoke Hange, snapping Levi out of his thoughts. “Wouldn’t you have been in hell then? Everything you described sounds like your personal version of hell, and in some beliefs that’s how that place is generally portrayed as.”

The captain frowned at her, annoyed at how her, of all people could dismiss the horrific experience he just went through. “I don’t have time to debate it with you,” huffed Levi, snatching his omni-directional mobility gear from the table. “I need to pay our old friend Malik a visit, so this never happens again.”

“Levi, wait!” called out Hange, causing him to turn around once more to face her, not wanting to hear her say he should stay back and rest. He didn’t have the time nor the desire to rest, feeling he was living on borrowed time, the captain had to find his solution to stay out of that filthy place, and Malik held the key to it. Still, he decided to give her the benefit of the doubt even though every instinct told him not to.

“What?”

“You said we’d go to the carnival together on Friday,” whined Hange, looking down at the ground as if she were a child being told “no”.

Levi sighed, he had no idea what she was referring to, and didn’t even want to know. However, he didn’t want to argue with her any further so he thought of the best answer to end this discussion as fast as he could. “No.”

“Oh…..” muttered Hange, lowering her head down, as if her very soul left her with the confirmation of Levi’s rejection.

“Oh, and one more thing,” Levi spoke, gaining her attention once more, with a small smile overtaking her sorrow. A glimmer of hope shined before her.

“Maybe he has something else planned for us? Maybe something more intimate?”

“Marco says ‘hi’ and Annie claims a simp stole her Titan abilities, whatever that means.”

Then, as if the last word he spoke departed from his mouth, Levi disappeared from the room, off on his mission to save himself from Heaven.

“Now…. where were we?” Hange asked, keeping a disappointed look on her face while she stared down Peanut, reloading the rocket launcher firmly planted in her hands. The interrogation would be the only thing to help keep the Section Commander in reach of high spirits, but the denial still stung hard.

All Hange could do was let out a small whimper as she fired off the rocket launcher, eliciting a pained scream from her captive. “Not even the screams of a Titan can cheer me up now.”

***

The mess hall was blooming, thanks to Tie day. Everyone celebrated the delicious food they were gorging on while appreciating the festivities surrounding them. The decorations were on point, completely covered with Thailand aesthetics and traditions, giving everyone in the cafeteria a full on experience of the country.

Despite the festivities taking place, only one table was populated heavily due to the hype that surrounded one of tomorrow’s combatants: Eren Yeager.

“Eren’s table is really crowded.” Connied pointed out, glancing over at the lively celebration taking place at the neighboring table.

“You don’t need to point that out.” muttered Jean, looking away from the party and towards barren tables with no population whatsoever.

“At least we have room to recline!” Sasha cheerfully yelled out, trying to find a positive for her friend, stretching her legs out on the bench, but quickly found themselves collided with someone.

“Ow!” Porco yelled out from the gluttonous scout’s feet accidentally kicking him in the side.

“Sorry…” Sasha apologized softly, as her face turned bright red while she moved her feet back to the ground.

“Wait, why are you here? Shouldn’t you be other with Eren, since I thought everyone loooooved him,” Jean nearly hollered, still miffed at the ample attention the brat was getting.

“Eh, I just hate Reiner,” Porco answered, shooting a quick glare at Reiner letting out a belly laugh from what Eren just said.

“Oh? Why do you hate him? He seems like a standout guy,” asked Connie.

“The guy is just an unreliable jackass who will steal other people’s personalities to make himself feel better,” briefly explained Porco, as his voice nearly cracked with unbridled rage. The simple mention of Reiner, much less that name coming out of his mouth was enough to froth, but unlike the past, he had to keep it down to a much more manageable level. He didn’t need to compromise the mission of eradicating the “Eldian Devils”, or allow Reiner to claim all the glory in completing the mission.

“Uh… care to elaborate?” Jean asked, causing Porco to turn his attention back to the three Scouts that sat next to him. All of them casted looks of bewilderment at him, trying to comprehend his reasons for hating what they considered to be a big brother to everyone. Porco, on the other hand, had to think of a reason to get them off his back, and luckily, thanks to a conversation he overheard, he thought of an acceptable answer.

“No,” muttered Porco.

“Why?” asked Jean, seemingly taking the simple no as answer.

Porco gritted his teeth, agitated the simple answer did not satisfy the three nearby patrons. Instead, he’d have to clarify while attempting to be coy at the same time. The upcoming Titan Shifter didn’t expect it to work, but he had to try. “He’s just an asshole. I don’t need to explain myself!” he snapped, taking a sip from his mug.

“But he’s one of the most likable people here. He’s like top ten,” Sasha pointed out.

“Can we just go back to brooding about Jean getting his ass kicked!?” Porco nearly blared out, slamming his fist down on the table, eliciting a small jump from Connie.

“I rather not,” vocalized Jean, moving his head down towards the table.

“And I rather not elaborate, so neither of us are getting what we want,” reasoned Porco, followed by a large gulp from his drink.

The group of four sat quietly, all trying to find a way to reel back from the argument, but the awkwardness of it. The three Scouts hardly knew the newcomer, but for some reason, they felt a rather strange connection with him. As if he was a long time friend of theirs, and all of them desperately wanted to claw out of the troublesome situation they all sat in. Thankfully, Connie thought of the perfect question to bail them out.

“So….. you guys excited for Mannequin?”

“Oh my god! Yes! That’s my favorite film of all time!” Porco ecstatically spoke out, his vocal cords vibrating as if he nearly sang it out while waving his hands left and right.

“Care to tell us why?” Sasha asked.

“Hell yeah I’ll tell you why it’s the greatest movie of all time!” Porco sang out, bursting out of his seat, as he then stood on the table. Jean, Sasha, and Connie all glanced at each other, not fully sure if they wanted to hear about how great a mediocre flick was, but it was certainly more palatable than the awkward situation they were previously in.

“Reiner,” Eren peeped out, as if air was barely getting through to his mouth.

“What’s on your mind my man?” Reiner asked, a smile firmly planted on his face, excited to hear what his little buddy was about to ask.

“You think we can get another table? It feels a bit too cramped here,” choked Eren, desperately trying to get his request out.

“Can’t bring over another table, Eren. This is the cool table, and there’s only one cool table in this cafeteria!” Reiner reasoned.

“Oh my god….” muttered Eren.

“But I can tell you what I can do!” Reiner announced, putting two of his fingers up to his lips and unleashing a whistle. As if in a flash, the four children perked their heads up, turning towards their captain.
“What’s the situation, Reiner? Do I need to shoot someone?” Gabi yelped out, bouncing up and down in her seat, the thought of taking yet another person’s life fueled her with adrenaline to keep her going for days.

“No, god no,” Reiner muffled out, his eyes widening at Gabi’s bloodlust. His little cousin’s murderous desires were something that had to be taken care of, but his homie’s needs were far more important. After the fight, he would sit her down and tell her to chill out with the lingering thoughts of mass murder.

“But…. um…. Munchkin squad, our homie is feeling cramped! I need two of you to give up your seats so our main man can prosper!” announced Reiner as if he were giving a very important speech.

Gabi stood up in her seat, putting her hand over her chest and declared, “Oh captain, my captain! It will be my honor to find the worthy candidates to vacate their seats!”

The small girl immediately snapped her head towards Zofia and Udo, and with a glare in her eyes, barked “Get out!”

“OH GOD! I KNEW IT! I KNEW I WAS EXPENDABLE! I KNEW I WOULD OUTLIVE MY USEFULNESS!” Udo bawled out, collapsing from the bench as Zofia simply got out of her seat.

“Whatever. I was getting tired of everyone stanning for a brat with daddy issues,” mumbled Zofia, who grabbed the writhing Udo and dragged him out of the mess hall.

“Uh…. Reiner…” coughed Eren.

“Don’t worry, Eren. We got the situation under control,” announced Reiner, satisfied about clearing the bench.

“That’s the problem. You cleared the wrong side,” pointed out Eren, as the two scanned the bench opposite of them.

“Right, not thinking straight am I? Barely know what I’m saying here,” mumbled Reiner, slightly embarrassed by his miscalculations. He turned to his left and spoke, “Gabi, Falco, go to the other side.”

The two kids without any hesitation scrambled over while Reiner’s mood changed considerably, wrapping his arm around his new best friend. “You must be feeling proud! Nearly all of your friends are here celebrating you and how you’re going to beat up horseface!”
“Uh…. Reiner, almost everyone here is a friend of yours…. and Ymir.” Eren retorted.

“Between you and me, Ymir’s a total bitch. I only invited her because of Krista,” whispered Reiner, annoyance dominating his voice as he did not care for the woman’s apathy and how she’s trying to steal Krista away from him. Still, he had to keep himself as composed as he can for the good of his homies and the love of his life.

“I heard that, asshole!” growled Ymir, malice blaring brightly in her eyes as she shook in her seat, readying to lunge at the man.

Reiner returned the same gesture, wanting to not only give his rude teammate a taste of her medicine, but to prove his worth to Krista. Once he bested her, Krista would come running into his arms and choose him as her mate. Surely, not only being stronger than his rival, but being a generally nicer person would be enough.

The two continued to stare each other down, their piercing eyes practically daring the other to make the first move. However, neither would make the first move as if they were all bark and no bite. Then, footsteps made themselves known as Armin approached the table.

“Hey Eren….” Armin tried to speak out, but Reiner snapped his head back at the strategist. He vaulted from his seat and nearly tackled him. “Oh my god!”

Armin cowered in fear as Reiner started to lift him up by his shirt. The Titan Shifter glared at Armin, who’s eyes were flooded out of the possibility of getting assaulted by someone he thought he could call a friend.

Reiner turned his head back at Eren, “This guy bothering you, man?”

“What, no? That’s just Armin! Put him down! Christ..” Eren screamed out, nearly jumping from his seat to help his best friend be relinquished from Reiner’s iron grip.

Reiner’s glare was vanquished by a bright smile, as his big brother-like personality took form once more. He set Armin down and gently patted him on the head, “That’s good, that’s good. Welcome to the table, my man.”

“Uh….. thanks,” Armin stammered, slowly taking his seat at the table, still terrified at what just transpired as he continuously felt himself vibrating.

“So, Armin,” Eren spoke, causing the strategist to turn his head towards his long time friend. “What was it you wanted to ask about?”

“I….. I don’t remember. Reiner scared me so much that I can’t remember anything,” stuttered Armin, still shaking from the very recent assault.

“I am so sorry my man. It’ll never happen again,” apologized Reiner, placing his hand on his small friend’s shoulder, but yet, the gesture was not enough. Reiner felt himself slipping from being a good person and instead subconsciously letting himself devolve like a half-assed piece of shit for assaulting one of his main man’s friends.

“Don’t worry! I can help rejog your memory!” Gabi announced happily, pulling out her rifle and pointing it straight at Armin’s head.

“Oh fuck!” Everyone except for Mikasa screamed out as they scrambled under the table as Reiner, having to clear himself from his depression for the moment, snagged the gun away from his little cousin. Gabi immediately frowned at her idol, as he then spoke, “Where do you keep getting all of these guns?”

“I want to go back to our room, Ymir!” Krista bawled, not only afraid by the actions Gabi committed, but upset by how all of her friends are acting. She hated her friends fighting each other, but these past few days made it unbearable for her. The only solace she was able to previously find from the ongoing war with Titans was being able to enjoy the downtime with them. The people she saw as the only family she ever had, but were now breaking apart rapidly.

“There, there,” Ymir spoke softly, trying to evoke a calming feeling for her best friend and crush, as she lifted her up. “I’ll get you back to our room and after that we can maybe get married.”

“I’d… I’d like that,” stammed Krista, nearly coughing her words.

As Ymir nearly escorted Krista out of the cafeteria, she turned around and glared at everyone. “You should all be ashamed of yourselves!”

The two soon departed as Reiner’s mouth dropped, feeling like a complete failure at winning his crush over. His mouth quivered, searching for the words he needed to speak his mind. All he could say, however, was “Why? Why did she choose her over me?”

“Careful big cousin! Don’t get too attached! Remember what grandpa said?” beamed Gabi, as she stood proudly next to Reiner.

“No simps allowed in the Braun family,” slowly recited Reiner, still frozen in place at the horror that transpired.

“Exactly! Otherwise you’d be a Hoover! Like Bertholdt!” Gabi pointed out, feeling smug that her family has a higher social standing than Bertholdt’s.

“This is the first thing I’ve said all day!” Beretholdt yelled out, feeling incredibly agitated by Gabi constantly belittling him. Reiner was his best friend, as he was glad to have him as such, but he hated “little Hitler”. Not only for her constant taunting, but how she treated everyone except for her cousin. If he could find a way, he would kill her when the time came to eradicate everyone in the base and frame her murder onto someone else.

The Titan Shifter smiled softly at the thought and would enjoy every moment when the time came. However, that thought dissipated when Gabi screamed out “Ew! You’re smiling at me! I don’t want to be infected by your simpness!”

Bertholdt slammed his head down on the table and muttered, “I hate my life.”

“Welcome to the party, pal!” Jean yelled out from across the room.

***

The day had arrived.

Nearly every member of the Survey Corp, the Garrison and the Military Police piled in the colosseum, all of them excited for the coming fight. Sales at the concession stands were at an all time high, even higher than “The Three Iguanodons: The Search for the Watering Hole”. Everyone took their chosen seats and held their food high as the cheering was rampant, the opposing doors were drawing up, revealing the two combatants.

Eren jumped from the massive door frame and greeted the roaring crowd. The Titan shifter waved his hands in front of them, the crowd instantly going crazy for him, cheering as if he was their lord and savior. All the while, Jean stepped out and the audible noises from the crowd went silent.

All that could be heard was the chippering cry of a praying mantis.

“Goddang Kamacuras getting in the colosseum again!” Hannes moaned out, pulling out a mop as he repeatedly started wacking the gimantis with it, ushering it out of the massive arena.

Jean frowned at the lack of support he was getting, and decided to push on nonetheless. He marched to the center where Eren was heading as well. Both combatants soon stopped at their destinations and stared each other down as the crowd was beginning to rev back up.

“So, Jean. Where’s your mech or were you not able to find anyone to take pity on you?” taunted Eren, crossing his arms while he smirked at his rival.

“Oh, I got one. You’ll be seeing it here shortly,” Jean remarked as he too had a smirk of his own, but deep down he was worried. Worried about how viable the mech he had to settle for would be, but there was no going back. He just hoped it would be enough to at least cave Eren’s face in.

Then, as if on cue, two helicopters flew over the colosseum with Jean’s mech in tow. The arrival immediately captured the audience’s attention as the aircraft slowly made their descent, gently lowering the payload down to the arena. The mech soon made landfall as the helicopters relinquished their grip on it and flew. Any suspense or wonder that was geared towards the arrival vanished.

All that replaced it was laughter.

“That…. That’s your mech!?” Eren pointed out, nearly collapsing to the ground due to his fit of laughter. “This…. is… so much better….. than fighting you without a mech!”

Jean’s blood boiled as his face was a bright red as the laughter from the crowd didn’t help either. He wanted to reduce Eren to paste more than he previously wanted.

Jean took a step forward while pointing at his mech,trying to justify its usefulness. “Well, Mechani-Kong has some surprises of its own!”

“That’s what you called it!?” bawled Eren as he collapsed on his back and started to roar with laughter.

“Well, uh, look at it! It’s very capable!” Jean retaliated, pointing at the giant mech behind him, as a metal plate on its chest ruptured and collided with the ground. The pilot of the mech cringed while grinding his teeth together at how his mech was falling part before the battle even began.

Image

“Tell you what, Jean,” spoke Eren, as he slowly got up to his feet, recovering from his paralyzing laughter. “You use that robot’s right index finger to move up and down and I’ll let you throw a free punch. Sound good?”

“I’ll take you up on that offer, jackass,” muttered Jean, dismayed at Eren continuing to mock him.

“That’s if the arm can even move!” laughed Eren, pressing his hand on his stomach once more.

“Right, asshole,” Jean mumbled as he made way towards his mech while Eren remained motionless, getting ready to transform.

“Hello ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to another exciting episode of the KW…. I mean exciting fight! Today, we have the Attack Titan vs. Mechani-Kong!” the announcer reported.

Jean climbed into his mech, as he then flipped every switch needed to fully power the cheap robot on. He wrapped his hands around the controls, ensuring he’ll be directing its every movement without fail, hopefully. The veteran scout looked down at Eren who still smirked at him as he raised hands towards his mouth. In a blinding flash, which caused Jean to nearly shield his eyes away as Eren morphed into his Attack Titan body.

The Demon of Justice let out an earth shattering roar as it once again got the crowd riled up. They cheered at humanity’s savior while Jean simply rolled his eyes as he awaited for the announcer to call the fight.

Armin on the other hand rubbed his hand over his head, still feeling uneasy about the coming fight. Sweat leaked from his body as no matter how this would end, he would feel sick to his stomach. He didn’t want to lose either of his two good friends despite how weird or angry they could be.

“Hey,” a soft, relaxed voice spoke, gaining the strategist’s attention. He looked down to see the voice belonging to Pieck smiling softly at him. “I can help ease your troubles.”

“How… what can you possibly say that’ll calm me down?” instituted Armin, trying to go through every possible suggestion his newfound acquaintance could say to him.

“Oh, I don’t need to say anything. Just to give you something… for the right price of course,” spoke Pieck, reaching in her coat pocket and pulling out a bag containing a couple of joints.

Armin inspected the bag and its contents as it made his eyes widen. His mouth trembled, shifting his eyes back to Pieck, who still kept that warm smile directed at him. “Is…. is that marijuana?”

“It is. Interested?” inquired Pieck.

Armin was going to answer her question, but a thought rammed into him like a bullet train, letting out an utter “Is that why everyone bought concessions!?”

“More or less,” surmised Pieck.

“Oh my god! Sasha!” Armin squealed out, terrified at the thought of his gluttonous friend getting munchies. Her normal attitude was scary enough, but if she was under the influence and had a case of the munchies, then the whole world would simply be sentenced to a never ending famine.

“Relex, my timid friend. I was told to avoid selling to her, or at least give her oregano instead,” clarified Pieck, providing Armin a sigh of relief.

“This joint is worthless!” Sasha cried out from several seats away, not feeling the precious high like everyone else was feeling.

“So….. interested?” hummed Pieck, inching herself closer to Armin.

“Between this, worrying about Sasha trying to get high and the upcoming late afternoon shower, sign me the hell up!” Armin declared, pulling out a wad of cash and slapping it onto Pieck’s palm.

The brilliant tactician accepted the payment and handed the recreational substance to Armin, as he started to smoke the joint. Pieck giggled at Armin trying out his first joint, noticing his struggles to keep it lit and to firmly hold it.

“Pleasure doing business with you,” smiled Pieck, stuffing the cash in her bag, observing how it was ten times the size it was originally before she started to sell everyone her supply. “It’s all coming along nicely.”

“Hold onto your butts everyone, because this fight is about to start in three…” the announcer trailed off counting down to the fight everyone was waiting for.

Jean tightened his grip on the controls, readying himself to go full out on Eren when the time has come. His forehead was drenched with sweat while his palms shook ever so slightly, but nonetheless, kept himself composed.

“Two!”

The Attack Titan cracked his knuckles, feeling highly confident in winning this fight. The Demon of Justice stared at Mechani-Kong as another piece of its mechanical body plopped to the ground. Eren let out a small chuckle, knowing this wouldn’t even be a fight, but a slaughter.

“One!”

Sasha opened a container and poured the enchilada sauce all over her sandwich. She then wrapped her mouth around her meal and slammed her teeth down on it, savoring every bit of its contents.

“Fight!” the announcer screamed out ecstatically as the two combatants immediately charged forward, letting out their battle cries.



Jean lifted his controls up, forcing Mechani-Kong’s right fist up, slamming it into the Titan’s face. However, the punch simply bounced off his cheek as it did not phase him whatsoever. Instead, the Attack Titan let out a brief laugh, reveling in the pathetic punch. Jean growled at how Eren was mocking him, the mech may have not been anything special, but it wasn’t that pathetic.

Before Jean can enact his next move, the Attack Titan let out a monstrous roar and sent a fist flying into Mechani-Kong’s chest, sending it soaring towards a wall. Within the point of collision, several pieces dropped, revealing the inner workings of the mechanical behemoth while others were left dangling.

Jean gritted his teeth, a sense of dread washing over him. He knew in the back of his head that the battle was already over, but he was stubborn enough to not lay down and accept defeat. The pilot took a deep breath, recomposing himself as he pulled himself out of the impact he left in the wall.

“Let’s just hope the bubble gum Sasha put on the joints is enough to carry me through,” Jean spoke, praying the bottom of the barrel material will be enough to provide him salvation.

Before Jean could do anything further, the Attack Titan lunged onto him, pushing him back in the Mechani-Kong shaped crater in the wall. The pilot let out a scream of anger as he couldn’t get one minute to stand on his feet. Jean tilted the arms up to defend himself, but it was all for naught as the Attack Titan smacked them out of the way. With each punch reared back, he unleashed a volley of strikes on the mech’s chest. Every strike birthed sparks erupting from its chest while Jean let out yet another snarl of frustration. He was, once again, powerless to deflect his punches, but an epiphany hit him!

“You’re too busy focusing on the body, but you completely forgot what’s underneath,” chuckled Jean, tilting the controls down, thus making the mech’s hands go down and remove two grenades from its belt. He unhooked the pins and let out a maniacal laugh as he latched them onto the Attack Titan’s sides.

The Attack Titan, however, continued his assault, creating several dents in the armor, highly damaging the mech. All Eren could do was laugh as this was going even better than he expected it. As much as he wanted Jean to suffer, he’d rather get this over with, so he could be his friends, his actual friends, and to maybe, talk to Hiana once more. Her forcing herself onto him certainly surprised him, but very much intrigued him. He felt naturally drawn to her. He couldn’t explain it, but something felt right about the two of them.

“You know, I think I would make a good father. I know I doubt myself a lot, but I think I would do a good job at being a father.”

BOOM!

The Attack Titan unleashed a pained scream as it felt like his sides shattered to pieces. The Demon of Justice felt himself collapsing onto the mech, as it let out a gurgled cry.

“What the hell? What hit me!?” growled Eren, inspecting his body for wounds he saw his sides completely blown off. The Attack Titan snapped his head back at the Mechani-Kong and unleashed a blood curled cry.

“You dirty motherfucker!”

“Gotcha, you little bastard!” Jean cheered out, flipping on a few switches to change up its momentum. “Now, get a load of this!”

Jean shifted the controls forward, commanding the mech to hunch over and to wrap its arms around the thrashing Titan. With yet another thrust to the controls, Mechani-Kong finally broke free from the imprisoning crater and rammed his opponent across the colosseum. The Attack Titan slammed his fists down on the mech’s back, but his strikes did not deter him. In fact, it just motivated Jean to push forward, knowing how much Eren was panicking in the situation they were in. Within seconds the two crashed into the wall as the weakened Titan was getting railed by the mech’s punches. While nowhere near as powerful as his own, Mechani-Kong’s many punches was enough to agitate the demon.

“No! That bastard! I’m not letting myself be taken down by a robot munke! There’s still so much I need to conquer! There’s still so much!”

The left side of his body quickly started to snap itself back to place, regaining its composure for that side.

“The Colossal!”

As if on cue, the right of his body stitched itself back together, ensuring full functionality for his mobility.

“The Armored!”

The Attack Titan planted his feet firmly to the ground, readying to strike his mechanical foe and to teach Jean a lesson into never pissing him off. His hands took the form of fists, raising themselves up to unleash two devastating blows.

“Hiana!”

The Rogue Titan unleashed a battle cry so loud that several members of the audience had to cover their ears. Before Jean could even put two and two together, he felt the powerful fists colliding into the mech’s head, as the impact nearly crushed him like a trash compactor. Jean had to call off his assault, having to recompose himself due to nearly being squashed by the head’s interior collapsing in on itself.

Without having much control, Jean couldn’t stop his mech from collapsing on its back, losing all stability it once had. With fire in his eyes, the Attack Titan bailed himself out of his prison and lunged at his fallen foe. He reeled his arms back as Jean observed trying to counter the incoming attack, but it was fruitless as Eren was far faster than him. His fists pounded on the mechanical behemoth’s body, greatly denting it more and more with each punch.

Jean knew there was no proper way he could retaliate. His punches could not keep him down for long and the mech did not have the mobility to outclass him. Still, he had one solution left. Jean hated the idea, knowing Eren will either survive it or it will horribly backfire on him, leaving him to be a smoldering corpse inside a hunk of junk.

“Screw it!” snarled Jean, putting his hands on the controls once more. “What choice do I have?”

Jean shifted the controls, eliciting Mechani-Kong’s right leg to lift up, an action that easily got the Attack Titan to notice. Eren ceased his assault and grabbed a hold of the leg, as he stared at the ruined head of the robotic ape.

“Not falling for that shit again!”

The Attack Titan, barely putting any effort in it, ripped the mechanical limb off. He threw the leg over his shoulder, showing no desire to inspect or to even taunt Jean with it as he went for the other leg.

“I know it’s pointless to go after the other leg now. My victory is all but guaranteed, but Jean is a clever son of a bitch. I can’t leave no stone unturned.”

Eren wrapped his hands around the leg, pulling on it. He let out a devilish like chuckle as he already heard the bolts popping out and saw the bubble gum stretching far past its limit. It was only a matter of time now.

Snap!

The Attack Titan yanked the limb out of its joint and held it high, eliciting cries of joy from the audience. Eren rejoiced in it, feeling proud that he can not only win the crowd over, but to humiliate Jean before he’s reduced to pieces. Before Eren could dispose of the limb and return to his previous assault, he felt something wrap around his neck.

“What the hell!?”

Eren looked down at the ruined Mechani-Kong and noticed something was very, very off. His torso was missing something, something that was very powerful.

The grenade belt was missing!

“No! Why didn’t I go for that first!”

The Attack Titan let out a blood curled cry, absolutely terrified at the fate that awaited him. Without giving it a second thought, he discarded the leg as he slammed his hands on the belt, desperately trying to yank it off. However, Jean’s grip would not be overturned. Mechani-Kong tightened the belt around the Titan causing it to unleash gagged cries as it still tried to claw it off.

Jean cackled at Eren panicking, knowing full well this was the end. “Should have just chosen someone, but it seems like I had to choose for you, and what I choose for you is DEATH!”

The grenades detonated, blanketing both combatants in a fiery explosion as orange clouds obscured everyone’s vision on the conclusion of the fight. They all made noise, ranging from curiosity to concern over the fates of Jean and Eren.

Within seconds, the smoke dissipated as the battle ground was turned into a bloody and metallic mess. The Attack Titan’s corpse remained on its knees as to everyone’s horror, his head was completely blown off! Pieces of his head and hands were splattered all over, their blood providing a new coat of paint for the walls.

All the while Mechani-Kong was in no better condition. Its hands were completely blown off from holding the belt and the ensuing blast vaporized the majority of its bottom half. Whatever remained, however, shared the same fate as the Attack Titan’s discarded bits. Scattered around the colosseum.

GASP!

Jean patted his body rapidly, his breathing was rapid as he snapped his head upwards, noticing the Titan’s head completely blown off. His eyes widened while his mouth shook softly. Jean couldn’t believe it.

He won.

Still, he imagined the audience didn’t know who won, but he had to find some way to fill them in on the good news. Jean gripped the controls, at least what’s left of them and moved them around rapidly, hoping it would elicit some sort of reaction. Fortunately, he was in luck as the arms of the mech raised up, gaining a collective gasp from the crowd. Noises that made Jean smile, knowing they will soon be celebrating and his accomplishment of vanquishing the brat.

“Why did you have to kill him, you son of a bitch!” Hiana bawled out, standing up from her seat as tears blanketed her face.

“What the hell bro!? Why did you kill my man?!” roared Reiner, tightening his fists as he was getting ready to beat an answer out of the surviving combatant.

The crowd was getting riled up, upset and furious over their champion meeting such a grim fate. Though, unlike Reiner and Hiana, others had different reasons to be very upset over the outcome.

“I had five-hundred dollars on him!” Erwin cried out angrily, ripping up his ticket.

Sasha and Connie snapped each other looks of concern, realizing what they needed to do for their friend. “Uh….. good job, Jean! We’re so proud of you!” Sasha tried to yell out, but was reduced to a stutter due to the likely reactions she would have gotten.

That action was further reinforced by Mikasa’s demonic stare. A stare that ensured the world she would take it all on. “You better get ready for round two, Jean, because I won’t be pulling back any punches!”

Before Mikasa could do anything, the Attack Titan’s body rattled, gaining everyone’s attention. Jean glanced over to the moving corpse and noticed something peculiar. He pressed forward in his seat, trying to get a better look at it as something struck him.

“What? No! There’s no way!” contemplated Jean, trying to understand why the body was still moving.

Before he could ponder it any further, the charred nape exploded and a figure was launched out. As if it was coming out of the shadows, Eren revealed himself to everyone; albeit in a less than ideal form.

His clothes were tattered as his cloak had several holes in, but neither of these things seemed to deter him. What concerned and even horrified nearly everyone, however, was that any trace of flesh and muscle that was on his head was gone. All that was left was a skull underneath his hood.

As Eren descended, he pulled out his ultrasteel blades and glared at the ruined Mechani-Kong. “I’m gonna fucking kill you, Jean!” Eren shrieked out.

“Holy fucking shit!” screamed out a terrified Jean, as he immediately began mashing every control he can to defend himself from the incoming threat.

“My man!” Reiner ecstatically cheered out watching his best friend descend onto his rival.

“He could do a good job at cosplaying as the Grim Reaper,” Pieck pointed out, observing how bad Eren’s current condition was.

“He’s the sexiest Grim Reaper ever,” Hiana spoke softly, biting down on her lip, really enjoying the new look her crush was going for.

Jean brought what remained of the arms up to defend himself, but it was all for naught as Eren easily sliced through them. His blades were like a butter knife going up against Mechani-Kong’s butter like arms. Its limbs were reduced to pieces raining down on the ground next to him.

“Oh my god!” Jean screamed out as he was completely defenseless against him as his rival planted his feet on his mech’s head. Eren immediately started slashing through the layer of metal that separated them. Jean, having no other options left, pulled the plug and felt himself ejecting from the mech.

Right away he was greeted by a rough landing as he felt himself tumbling on the sand. The many rolls made his muscles ache, but it was salvation compared to what Eren would have done to him. The rolling ceased as Jean pulled out his own blades, hoping it would be enough to combat Eren, but before he could get them up, he felt a foot planted on his chest.

Jean turned his head upwards only to be met with Eren’s skull glaring down at him with the blades pointed straight at him. Sweat poured from his body as Jean shivered in fear, knowing this was the end of him.

“Everyone! Everyone!” a highly energetic voice called out, snapping both Jean and Eren’s attention away from each other and towards Hange running through one of the doors. She stopped just outside of the frame, looking at everyone with a massive smile on her face.

“I got some excellent news! I, Hange, after going through some messy stuff with my best friend and failing at some experiments I found something that’ll change my life around for the better!” The Section Commander declared as she glanced back at the door, footsteps rattled the floor.

A Titan made itself known, its bulbous head surfed the colosseum, observing every potential meal it can get its mouth on. Before it knew, the Titan’s hand was snatched up by Hange as she lovingly caressed it.

“Peanut and I are a couple! We’re a couple! We’re a couple in love!” sang Hange as she danced around in circles while continuing to hold her beloved’s hand.

Then, as quickly as she entered, both her and Peanut departed the colosseum, leaving everyone completely dumbfounded by what just happened. Eren snapped his boney head back to Jean and then towards his blades. Jean looked back up at Eren as he watched his very strange behavior, noting how unnatural it was on how Eren didn’t immediately kill him.

With a collective gasp, Eren dropped his blades as he took his boot off of Jean. “What… why did you do that?” Jean demanded, completely blown away by Eren’s random decision to spare him while slowly getting to his feet.

“I…. that announcement Hange made… made me realize life goes by really fast and…. at any moment, can take a complete and utter tonal whiplash, ruining the momentum of anything you were previously trying to do,” monologued Eren, looking back at Jean. Hatred no longer taking form, but of sympathy.

Jean took in what Eren just conveyed to him and knew he was right. His mind flashed to the whole journey he had to go through to get to this moment. Just when he thought something was about to make sense it completely changed to an entire different situation within a matter of seconds.

“You know, you’re right. I think we were being way too hasty with all of this,” Jean concurred, becoming slightly disgusted as eyes were starting to take form in the empty sockets of Eren’s skull.

“Jean, I’m sorry for everything,” apologized Eren with sorrow and regret in his voice for trying to kill a friend of his.

“Bro! I should be the one who's sorry! I said all of those things about your mom, which is just not okay! I am sorry!” Jean spat back, feeling incredibly bad about all the stuff he screamed out at his friend.

“We definitely made some mistakes and all of this shit started over me having, like, four love interests!” chuckled Eren, his bones rattling around, causing Jean to slightly shudder.

“Oh man, I’m still reeling back from that cringe I said right when the grenades went off!” panicked Jean, pressing hand up against his face in embarrassment.

Eren simply chuckled at Jean’s mistake and offered a few words of encouragement “It was pretty bad, but I’ve said worse as a child.”

The two shared a laugh over their musing of past mistakes as an idea flashed in Jean’s mind. An idea that’ll help improve Eren’s quality of life and his own by some extent.

“If I may suggest something, I’d say go with Hiana. She’s obviously crazy about you.”

“Right?” Eren excitedly yelled out, but quickly composed himself.
“I… I mean, I would like to be with her, but I’m afraid Mikasa will just go apeshit and slice her throat open!” reasoned Eren, wanting to do what Jean suggested, but is afraid of all the carnage that will ensue.

“Buddy,” smirked Jean as he put his hand on Eren’s shoulder. “I can take care of Mikasa, because she’s the only one I have my eye on.”

“Yeah, go for it! It would definitely get her off my back twenty-four seven,” permitted Eren, giving Jean his blessing to date his adoptive sister. “Just don’t piss her off, because there’s nothing I can do for you there.”

“Copy that, and say, I could go for a drink after the mess we caused, want to join?” asked Jean, feeling incredibly parched from the conflict they both involved themselves in.

“Heck yeah!” Eren shouted as him and Jean grabbed each other’s hands and gave each other a powerful handshake. The two then turned to head towards the nearest bar as the Titan Shifter then brought up a question. “You think we can stop and get some tylenol? My head’s killing me.”

“My….. my man,” stuttered Reiner, as a tear dropped down from his eye, watching Jean and Eren walking away together. “That… horseface took my best friend.”

Reiner dropped to his knees, mourning the loss of his best friend. Bertholdt looked down at his friend and simply rolled his eyes at his behavior. Sasha, on the other hand, felt bad at how her fellow scout was feeling. She approached him and tapped him on the shoulder, eliciting a turn from him.

“Here, you need these,” Sasha pointed out, pulling out two bottles of Sunny D.

Reiner’s eyes widened as he began to shake excitedly at the gift before him. He snatched up the two bottles and yelled out, “Two kinds of Sunny D? That’s more than I thought there was!”

He poured the contents of one of the bottles down his throat, moaning with satisfaction. The Titan shifter stared back up at Sasha, as his eyes watered once more, not of sadness, but of happiness. He wrapped Sasha with his burly arms, nearing taking her breath away.

“My man! You’re my new best friend now!” Reiner cried out, sobbing out of pure joy for the delicious drink she offered to him.

“Oh my god, Reiner!” Berthold cried out, furious at how childish his good friend was acting. He wanted to transform into the Colossal Titan, taking everyone’s life away, but had to relent as it would interfere with the plan in motion. Still, he couldn’t help but shake rapidly in anger over Reiner’s stupidity.

“Hey,” Armin spoke, getting the tall scout’s attention. “You want to be best friends?”

Bertholdt simply sighed at Armin’s request. He hated what Armin was suggesting, particularly how everyone was making their choices in a lapse of judgement. However, the strategist was one of the more calm members of the Scouts and would cause the least amount of headaches for him.

“Sure,” muttered a defeated Bertholdt as everyone soon began to depart the colosseum, leaving only one short person left.

Gabi shifted her eyes around the arena, noting how she was the last person in attendance to remain standing. “Huh, I guess we can add one more person to this story’s kill count.”

She pulled out her rifle and aimed it at you, the reader.

“Get nae nae’d!” Gabi cried out.

BAM!

To be continued in Levi vs. Malik vs. God
Spoiler:
WINNER:
Draw
KWC Co-Operations Manager and Resident Wumbo.
Soggy Noodles wrote:Anno brought back Showa ambition by doing smaller scales, morals and trying to examine humanity.

Seshita brought back Heisei ambition with absurd powerscaling, rad fights and fat asses.

Pair of kings.
MoarCrossovers wrote:We snorted crushed Morbius DVDs and snail shells

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GodzillavsRayquaza
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Re: K.W.C.E. #凸】♡】2021-aot-vltin-dy-LT←巨人 - Eren vs. Jean: Battle of the Bitch Babies

Post by GodzillavsRayquaza »

I was laughing the whole damn time I read this, 11/10
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ShinGojira14 wrote: Neither. Hideki Anno wins because he writes a hilarious comedic satire movie where Shin and Legendary have to team up to destroy a grotesque crap-monster created by the constant toxic bickering of Shin fans and Legendary fans.
SoggyNoodles2016 wrote: Yup, my dad works at Legendary, the Nebulans are gonna be in the next movie and they're gonna get beat because Madison throws coffee in the leaders face.

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ShinGojira14
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Re: K.W.C.E. #凸】♡】2021-aot-vltin-dy-LT←巨人 - Eren vs. Jean: Battle of the female dog Babies

Post by ShinGojira14 »

This was a fantastic way to begin my day. Well done, man. :lol: :huge:
"William Knifeman! AH! AH! AH!"

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